Thursday, May 20, 2010

A visit from my Mom and sister and now a headache!!

Yesterday my Mom and sister stopped by for a few minutes after my sister had a doctors appointment here in town. Now don't get me wrong I love my family with all my heart but sometimes I would just love to smack them up side the head a few times~Anyone else out there feel like that once in a while.

I am a stay at home, homekeeper. I do not work outside the home but I do work vey hard at being a homekeeper. I do not do it correctly all the time but I give it my best everyday. I do not always get everything done that I have on my list but still I strive everyday to give it my all and to do it joyfully!!

My family have seemed to treat me differently after I got married and after my brother died. I had sent them all a letter about my relationship with Jesus Christ and now feel like I have been branded the black sheep of the family.

Roger and I Love each other very much and enjoy each others company. I enjoy being home on a daily basis, I am not a shopper, I do not enjoy leaving my home and being gone all day to come home and have nothing ready for dinner. I pride myself in the fact that I am a good helpmeet to my husband. I work on dinner prep most of the day, no I am not in the kitchen cooking all day but getting things ready. I know what we are having for dinner before 5pm.

When my mom and sister visited yesterday it was around 4:30 or 5pm and one of their questions was do you have to wait and eat with Roger when he gets home or are you allowed to go to get something to eat with us? This is not the first time that I have had to answer to this type of question. first I don't HAVE to wait for Roger, I do so because I like to eat with him. second I don't need his permission to go somewhere. Does this satisfy their inquiry of course not, they just seem to ignore what I have said and keep bringing it up over and over.

The next thing, we Roger and I and the rest of the family were invited by a dear friend to a show that his school is putting on but it's at 6:30pm on Friday night, I said that we would love to go but that Roger doesn't even get home until about 7:30 or 8pm. so now they are wondering why can't I go without him. It's not that I can't go it's I would rather be with my husband.

I am not a servant as in a slave to my husband I do not fetch his slippers when he walks in the door but I do try to serve him as his helpmeet.MY husband leaves our home every m-f very early in the morning around 6AM he drives about 2 hours to his job and then comes home very late with another 2 hour drive he has been working 11 hours a day so totally that comes to 15 hours he is gone so when he comes home I like him to come home to a very clean and organized home with dinner ready for him when he gets here. I don't think that is too much to ask after he has worked so hard all day long.

The last question or concern that my mom had was when they were leaving, she said well come over and visit when you have nothing to do, I said I have tons of things to do so don't know when I will be able to visit, and her response was well would it hurt if you don't do those things for one day. I know she doesn't understand me but for me yes putting off todays things only make it to where I would have twice as much to do tomorrow. I like the fact that our home is clean, not spotless but nice and clean. I don't worry if someone where to drop by unannounced, because I keep my home clean.I like the fact that Roger and I do things together and enjoy doing things together. I have another sister who is married and for the past 10 years I have seen very little of things that her and her husband do together. I would never want a marriage like that, but they like it that way and are happy so I don't say anything about it.

THe thing that really just bugs me is the fact that I keep getting asked the same questions over and over and even after explaining the answer they still keep asking.
They are not Christians so maybe that has something to do with it. I don't know all I know is that I am tired of the stupid questions.

Sorry to all of my blog readers but I just had to get that off my chest!!



  1. Tell these folk: "Sorry? I don't understand the question?" Then turn it around with: "I enjoy Roger so much! He's so good to me."

    Then leave it at that. They're the ones with major issues and being unsaved, have no idea what a haven you have in Jesus and thereby in your marriage.

    I'll pray for you. I'll put your circumstances in my notebook.

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  3. Wow! It sounds like they don't understand the love between a woman and a man! I'm so proud of you for truly being Roger's helpmeet. The Lord has really been convicting me about being there for my husband (he works out of town during the week) when he is home, making his home a wonderful place to come home to, cooking for him, etc. You are doing EXACTLY what God asks of wives... don't let your family make you feel that way! Keep being a Godly example!

  4. Be strong Joann please don't let them wear you down-you know in your heart your desires and what makes you happy stick with it.Cheers Vickie

  5. Joann, I'm sorry you don't have a close and understanding relationship with your mom. I talk to my mom almost every day, sometimes several times in a day. (I don't have any choice. If I don't call her, she calls me.LOL) I spend at least one day a month with her, sometimes more. Mom doesn't understand a lot of the things I do and enjoy, but we just agree to disagree, so to speak. One example is my quilting. Mom doesn't even like to sew and can't imagine how I can enjoy working with fabric. When she gives me money for birthdays, etc., she always wants to know what I am going to do with it. She'll say, "More fabric?" I say, "Of course!" She just shakes her head and the subject is dropped. LOL Bren does bring up an interesting point. Maybe your mom is missing you and just doesn't know how to connect. Maybe you could say, "Mom, Roger and I would love to go out to dinner with you this weekend." That would also give her an opportunity to get to know Roger better. Just a suggestion. Since I don't know your mom, nor the relationship you have with her, this may not be an option. Just trying to help. ((((Hugs)))) to you, my friend. I will add you to my prayer list. Winona

  6. Joann, I don't know if you will see this, but I received your note and the email address I have for you bounced back. I hope this note finds you well and enjoying your summer! Brooke


Thank you so much for visiting my blog and leaving a comment, I truly thank you for your visit. Blessings,Joann