Blogging again......

The other day I had deleted my blog because I just wasn't finding that joy that I used to feel in posting on my blog. After many emails and some friends on facebook I took some time to think and pray about it and have decided maybe I wasn't looking hard enough to find the joy in it. The joy is there it just needs to be looked for and I wasn't doing it. There was also another reason and that has to do with the name of my blog Titus 2 keeper at home with a name like that one would come to the conclusion that my blog is written by some one who lives the Titus 2 life and they would be WRONG!! I am just like everyone else out there trying my best and struggling every day to be a keeper at home. I read other people's blogs and look at what they do and I don't even come close to measuring up to them and then it hit me I don't need to measure up to other people I just need to do my very best to live as God intended for me to. I have been struggling so hard these past few years just to get the minimum things done as far as housework is concerned, I have looked back through my blog and when I read some of my old posts I wonder who the heck that person was and where is she now! Since Roger has been without a job (end of February) I have been doing nothing except getting up really late and I mean late, wathcing tv all day and going to bed really late. I am starting to hate doing this, so with much prayer, lots of encouragement from my good friends and just getting up and doing it, I WILL get up and get back to my old Titus 2 lifestyle, I will still struggle daily but hopefully at the end of the day I will be able to hold my head up high and be proud of what I accomplished that day. I hadn't been posting very much because I felt like a failure. I so much want to be that Titus 2 proverbs 31 woman and I just wasn't achieving it but then was I really trying my hardest probably not. I pray that the Lord will give me the strength to get the things done that need to be done, the wisdom to work efficiently in my home and the courage to tell the truth about my not so wonderful life when it needs to be told.

I am a Titus 2/proverbs 31 struggling late 40's woman who loves God with all her heart, also I Love my husband and children and grandchildren.I want to be someone who my husband and children are proud to call their home keeper. I want God to use me and my home keeping to bless everyone I can.

Are there any struggling women out there?? I have also noticed on blogger that there aren't many women like me, I find lots of women who are younger and have children at home or women my age but still have children at home. My life is way way different than it was when I had small children at home and that has also been something I have been dealing with. Empty nest syndrome is something very hard to just get over. My youngest child Mattie has been gone now for oh about 3 years and I still miss him everyday.

I want to be the best home keeper I can and I plan to do this,it may take me a while and I may struggle everyday but I will do it!

I thank everyone who sent emails about my blog and the encouragement I get from some of my great friends some have blogs and some don't but they are all my friends and I love them for being there for me when I need them the most.

Blessings,Joann

My Testimony

Hello all and welcome to my blog, today I would like to share with you all my testimony of how I became a Christian.

I grew up in a non Christian home, I grew up in a catholic home and no that is not a Christian home. We went to church every Sunday for exactly 1 hour and if it ran even one minute more all you heard when you left was how long the service was. These people were complaining about having to be at church for a few more measly minutes. My home was not a place where anyone was encouraged to pray, or to read the Bible. We had the token large white Bible that only sat on a shelf under the popes picture. Do I believe the catholic church is a cult YES I DO!!

I remember going to CCd classes throughout my schooling days and then when I was older..i was probably about 24 -26 and I had watched a program on tv strange enough it was the Jim and tammi Bakker show and they talked about how you can pray to God and read the Bible anytime you wanted. Then came my inquiring at the catholic church about lent. I asked many people but not many could explain to me why and what the reason for lent was. All I know about the catholic version is that you give something up for 40 days before easter. My sister always gives up candy. I thought this was rather strange. I found out many years later that lent originally was when someone stopped doing some sort of sin for the 40 days and prayed to never do it again.

When my son was 2 years old and my daughter was 11 years old I asked Jesus to become my savior and my life changed immensley I got tired of the catholic church not being able to answer my questions and I really didn't like the fact that they basically say that regular people can't read the Bible for themselves, they need a preist to interpret it for them...what a bunch of baloney. We started to attend a protestant Church and finally for the first time I felt free to worship Jesus as I wanted to, No more rote prayers said as a whole. I could talk to Jesus whenever and wherever I wanted to . I also found out that in the Bible it says that Jesus forgives us our sins and that he also forgets our sins this is not what I was taught in the catholic church.IT also says in the Bible that when we die we will be with Jesus if we are born again and have asked him into our hearts.

I remember going to my brothers funeral about 9 years ago and the priest mentioning the fact that we all had to pray for him to get out of purgatory, I personally don't pray for dead people, I feel that their fate is sealed when they die. they either go to Heaven if their name is written down in the Lambs book of life or they go to Hell.

My life has been so much more meaningfull and happy since I became a Christian but sadly my family is still in the grips of the caholic church. They think because they are a catholic then life is just wonderful and since they are not bad then everything will be fine. They could not be more wrong. I have been told by some catholics that they are Christians, I don't think so you can not be a Bible believing Christian and also follow all the rules and such of the catholic Churh.

The catholic religion has made their own Bible including books that are not authentic and have changed the ten commandments making them okay to bow down to idols!! I pray daily for my family that are still brainwashed by the catholic church and really hope someday they will see the light of Christ.

So basically my testimony is that I was able to reject the religion of the catholic church to begin my new life as a child of God and I am so more fulfilled and happy than I have ever been.

I know that when the time comes I and breath my last on earth I will open my eyes and see Jesus, my King and savior.

I have made it through March so far....

The past two weeks have been very hard for me. Not only waiting for news of a job for Roger but having to struggle through the anniversary dates of my Brother's and Father's deaths. Some days it feels like it has been an eternity since they both passed away and other days it seems like yesterday.
My Brother was killed by a drunk driver while driving home one evening on March 15, 2002 and my father passed away quietly sitting in his favorite spot one Sunday morning watching the birds in the backyard on March 11, 2007.

Roger had a friend that every time we seen him at Church and we asked him how things were going he always said going good but just waiting for the Lord to return. I always thought this was strange why someone would not enjoy life and just be waiting to go home, but lately I am starting to feel the same way as he did. I sometimes pray for the Lord to come back.The world does not seem to be an enjoyable place anymore. There is so much crime, and money worries that it is very hard to find the joy in it.

We still are waiting to hear about a job for Roger and waiting is so hard for both of us. The time seems to go by at a snails pace.Roger had another job interview with a company that would keep us here in CA, but CA is not where we really want to be. I am not happy with the state of CA and we would love to move somewhere else.

I am still not crafting yet and don't know when I will return to it. I have plenty of patterns, fabric and embroidery supplies and yet they are not yet calling to me.

Next weekend we will be celebrating Dylan's 7th birthday at the local bowling alley. He wants a new bike and we found an orange one the other day that I think we will be getting him. His favorite colors are orange and green.

My Mom had her cataract surgery on Wednesday and is doing real good. I went out to lunch with her and my sister yesterday and had a nice time.

One of my old friends that I found on facebook and I are getting together next Wednesday for lunch. I think it will be fun catching up on the last 15-20 years...

Please have a wonderful weekend and thank you so much for stopping by.

Blessings,Joann

Molly is home

Molly is now home and resting comfortably. Thanks to all who prayed for her. Mandy is even being nice to her, I think she can sense something is a little different about Molly. We also had her dew claws removed as she had 2 of them when we adopted her. She has some real snazzy looking purple bandages on her two legs and she also needed to have one tooth pulled. I am so happy it is all done and over with. Right now she is laying on some cozy blankets on the couch and sleeping.

I feel very blessed to have the wonderful friends from my blog and on facebook that I know to call on for needed prayers.

Thanks again my treasured friends, Blessings,Joann

A couple of prayer requests

I have a few things I would like to ask of my readers to pray for. Tomorrow (Tuesday) our dog Molly is getting her teeth cleaned doesn't sound like to big of a thing but they have to put her out and we just don't like that at all. She really needs it done but we are both very anxious feeling about the whole thing and of course it will cost lots of money which we don't have right now.
The other thing is my mom is having cataract surgery on Wednesday. Please just keep both of them in your thougths and prayers.
I know some may think it is stupid to worry about Molly as she is just a dog but to us she is our baby that we would do anything for and we love her so much. Mandy will be doing a lot of crying tomorrow with her big sister gone for the whole day, but that is because she is a baby. She cries just when one of us goes outside...

Thanks to all of my wonderful readers.
Blessings,Joann

Mattie got a promotion!!

I just wanted everyone to know how proud I am of my little Mattie he was promoted to specialist (SPC) I don't know the exact date but within the last month. I have been trying to find a picture on the Havoc Hounds facebook page but no luck yet. If I ever do find one I will be sure to post it. Also please note I changed the address in the right sidebar to reflect his current rank.

I am just so happy today as most of the people I sent friend requests to from Escalon First assembly of God church have responded. So many of them look exactly like I remember. There is one family who also have a Matthew and he and my Mattie were in the same group in church, very strange to see him all grown up.

I pray that everyone has a very blessed week ahead and that I will have some good news about this job thing by the end of the week.

Blessings,Joann

Decisions, Decisions......

Today I made the decision to keep my facebook page. I had thought about getting rid of it but realized that I do enjoy, it maybe not all the time but the majority of the time.It is real nice to reconnect with old friends. Today I came across a name I hadn't heard or thougth of for almost 15 years and when I went to her facebook page I knew almost everyone on her friends list. that took me back to the one place where I felt was home. Back when Jennifer and Mattie were little we lived in a very small town and started going to the local Assembly of God Church. I knew the first time I stepped in that door I was home. Everyone was so wonderfully friendly and not just on that first day over the next 5 or 6 years that we attended there we were so graciously welcomed. I think about that church from time to time. It was the place my son at 2 years old learned his first Bible verse "We are helpers" not sure where it is in the Bible but I was so proud of him. Anyway enough of that.

This past week or two has gone by so slowly as we are waiting to hear about a job. I do not like to wait at all!!! This next week we are supposed to hear about it and I am praying it will be on Monday and not on Friday at closing time. Roger has tried to stay busy, but lets face it,it's so hard for someone who is used to working all day just sit around and wait. He has been helping around the house because well frankly I have been doing nothing. MY daily list of things to do has not been getting done at all. The basics get done, meal making and laundry but then that's because Roger is doing them. I have been totally dropping the ball on my homekeeping.

This past weekend we went over to Jennifer's house for a small party. Chris' Mom was visiting and we had never met her so it was nice to go and visit.

Katie showed us her and Dylan's new bunk bed set~










Jennifer's also got a new bed, I think it is very pretty~




Our tree in the back yard has been blooming and it is just gorgeous, it doesn't last very long but it sure is pretty~






Roger has been working on a new gate for the side of the house, it turned out beautiful~







Here you can see (if you look closely)Mandy on the other side of the gate looking through~





As I had mentioned in a previous post Mattie is getting married. We didn't know for sure when but we now have a tentative date October 22, 2011, I have been in contact with Sara, his future wife about giving her a bridal shower, this is a little hard as she lives in Las Vegas but her Mom lives here so she does plan to come this summer and I think we will just give her the shower then. This is also just a tentative date as if Roger gets a job we may have to move and then of course I won't be able to give her the shower. We will have to see what happens. Hopefully we will know by the end of next week.

I was looking through old photos yesterday and came across some from 2007 and I had so many crafty things I had done,seems like I just don't have the desire to do any type of crafts anymore! My favorite thing to do is embroidery but even that is just not interesting to me. I remember when I got the baby quilt for Katie. I started working on it in August and I had it embroidered and sent to get quilted and had gotten it back before she was born in October. I sat and worked on it for hours everyday and enjoyed every minute of it. It was a lot of work but it turned out so pretty when it was done.
Here she is with it, hanging on the wall in her bedroom~


I also made one for Dylan his was made of small squares and then put together and quilted ~




I only did the embroidery part the person who quilted them did everything else. Now I am just not interested in doing anything, even reading which is another thing I used to LOVE!!
Please if you remember keep me in your prayers and also Roger and the whole job situation.

I think this next week is going to be very stressful for both Roger and I but I am trying very hard to keep my head pointed at the sun..

I recently found an old song that I just fell in love with, I don't know the name of it but the chorus goes

I can't see the sun with my head to the ground,
tears fill my visions and weighs my heart down.
But I found the secret when I knelt to pray
That when I lift up my head then He lifts up my heart and my troubles just all roll away!!!

Blessings,Joann